Someone will most likely put a damper on this with some random factoid for me but for now this makes me very happy! This guy has invented a way to, well, watch the video and find out for yourself!
Totally amazing!
Yes that is a lot of exclamation points but this is very exciting. I still haven't had time to mess with my other photos but soon, very soon.
In the meantime, the RED WINGS won their first round of the Stanley Cup playoffs and are on to ROUND TWO!! WAHOOOOO!!!
To let everyone know I am alive and buried up to my eyebrows in projects and web sites that are SCREAMING to get done before the end of the semester here at the college. I have taken a pile of pictures of the redbuds in bloom here and other stuff but have NO time to resize and upload to photobucket to post in here.
So on that note,,, just be informed that some awesomely beautiful (the images not my photography) are on their way as soon as I get some breathing space.
Soon... The last day of school is April 25 and I have math online until May 7th but it won't be as tough for just the one class. So that is the latest news and I am reading all posts but not responding to all of them. Part of the reason is I read them at school and cannot log in all the time there.
Just so you know...
Love and huggggsssssssss to all!!!!!
My Mom died with me sitting by her side in some cold hospital in Oregon. It still feels like yesterday to me, and I told my daughter today that I think it will always feel like yesterday to me.
It is just a surreal feeling, knowing that the one person that loved you without any reservations is now gone. I know you might think me a bit nuts to still feel the pain of losing my mother but she was so much more than that to me.
She was truly and completely my best friend.
We could and did talk about anything and everything, from sex to the way we grieved over our lost pets. No one understood me the way she did and that never even happened until I was an adult and lived over 600 miles from home.
We were never close when I was younger and I always felt like an outcast in my family. Being the only one with green eyes in the family made me feel like I was adopted so many times when I was younger.
I know that isn't true now because when I look in the mirror I don't see myself anymore, I see my Mom. I feel like I am disappearing!
My mom would listen to me sob on the phone over the loss of my cat Scrunt, the end of my marriages, and the painful decisions I made putting down my 19 yr old cat Floyd and my 15 1/2 yr old dog Cameo. She cried with me on the phone and hugged me tight months later over the same thing when I finally saw her again. I didn't see them enough, that is for sure. They moved to Oregon in 1991 and it has never been financially easy for me to get up there to see them.
My Mom made it down here in 2004, bald as can be- to be here when my only daughter graduated from high school.
My son didn't graduate from high school (he got his GED afterward) so my Mom knew this occasion was very special to me.
She was ill and weak but she braved it not just that hot month in June of 2004 but back again to celebrate my 50th birthday with me in December. She was still bald but feeling a bit better.
I was so happy just to be with her. The funniest thing was that we were so used to talking on the phone for hours long distance and then when we were together we didn't seem to have as much to say, that we joked about calling each other while in the same house so we could chat!! I think it was because words were not needed the same way as the were when we were not together.
She was there for me when I had my first child- my son that decided to come into this world via an emergency caesarian that almost did us both in.
She and my Step-Dad, who has been my only Dad since I was 22, drove up in record time from San Diego. They got to hold my son the same night he was born, even arguing with a doctor who insisted that my 8 lb 7 oz boy was too big and beautiful to have just been born. He had a full head of hair that stuck out like a buzz cut grown long and so she had to show him the little tag on his bassinet that said “Hi I’m a boy and I was born at 12:55 pm.” It was quite comical.
They moved to Oakhurst the next year and stayed there until they left for Oregon in 1991. She was there when my daughter was born also- taking care of me once again now with a 7 yr old and a newborn. She taught me how to diaper a girl (I had no clue) and she was determined when the time was right to teach each of my kids in turn as they grew up to say the word s—t (rhymes with pit) because she thought every kid should learn it and I won’t say it. She was a pistol my Mom was.
She was there for me through every break-up, every divorce and every bad grade or detention my kids put me through. When I was so stressed over my last divorce and I would start to have anxiety attacks she could calm me down just by talking to me over the phone. She had that effect on me.
She would rejoice over every new accomplishment, new goal or new idea I would have. She (and Poppa of course is part of all of this) lent me money and encouragement when I was selling Nikken products (which she used until she died) and drove me to Portland and watched Jemma while I took the hardest test of my life for the Oregon Veterinary Boards which led to me being licensed in both Oregon and California. When I was selling a lot of my art she was sending me tip money she was making at the Sky Ranch in Oakhurst running the hotel part for art supplies.
She rooted for me the hardest when I started college in 2002 with a broken spine and spirit from losing my career.
When my best friend of 20 yrs decided we could no longer be friends without any explanation, my Mom was terribly hurt inside but she just kept telling me through my tears that “she wasn’t a true friend if she could do that to you.” She never understood why she would do that to me but I still don’t to this day know why or understand it.
She talked me out of the need for any anti-depressants because I never got that down knowing she was there for me to talk to. She wanted, more than anything on earth, to watch her baby graduate from college and give the farewell speech- the first one in my blood family to do so. Poppa has a PhD but on my Mom’s side of the family no one finished college. So I am the first. My niece has an LVN license from a vocational school- so she was actually first- but I am the first one with any degrees. I guess that is why I got three of them at once!!
I could go on and on but the point is that I didn’t lose just my Mom two years ago today. I lost my truest, most loyal best friend, cheerleader, guidance counselor and my Mom. That, my friends, is a lot to lose at one time.
This is a fitting color for this post because this is exactly what I sound like when I talk:
My little cold, the first one I have had in over 10 years or so, turned into a nasty case of bronchitis. I sound like a squeeze box when I breath and a frog when I talk. Lovely isn't it?
I did drag myself to Prompt Care yesterday to make sure I didn't have pneumonia and since I have mild asthma I wanted to be sure that was not getting worse.
They x-rayed my lungs and said I was fine and sent me home with a prescription of two drugs I already had at home, so I just went home.
All I have done is sleep and eat and sleep some more. Well I did do some work on a website yesterday but otherwise I am just wiped out.
Hence I have nothing to blog about and no pictures to post. Well I do but I haven't resized them yet to make them blog friendly.
So I am off to do my homework that is due tomorrow for math. By the way, after MUCH blood,lots of sweat and a few tears, I did pass my math class online with a C. I almost had a B at one point but oh well.
One more to go and I am DONE with math for my BS degree. At least that is what they tell me.
So ciao for now and have a Happy Sunday. To those that celebrate have a Happy Resurrection Day- no I won't say Easter because I so don't believe in it. That's another story altogether.... no bunnies and eggs for me thank you..
I hope I am well enough to make it to school tomorrow.. ugh...
This is a link to a very short video of a homeless guy in Santa Barbara,
California, and his pets. You can see these guys every week working State St. for donations.
The animals are pretty well fed and mellow. They are a family.
The man who owns them rigged a harness up for his cat so she wouldn't have to walk so much (as the dog and he do). At some juncture the rat came
along, and as no one wanted to eat anyone else, the rat started riding
with the cat—and often, on the cat!
The dog will stand all day and let you talk to him and admire his
altruistic "we are one" personality for a few chin scratches.
The Mayor of Santa Barbara filmed this clip and sent it out as a
Christmas card.
Pretty amazing isn't it? Especially since the rat just 'showed up'? Since it's not a street (wharf) rat it looks like someone's lost pet to me...The music is pretty cheesy but oh well...
I'm just sayin'...
Well although I feel like I never get out of this chair except to go to school and do the same thing, I did get out last weekend and go meet up with my friends of Golden Bough who were having a 25 year re-union with two ex members.
I took a few pictures of the jousting which was a bit more fun to watch this time and of the people walking around the place looking very Celtic.
I did go watch the re-union concert but they put them in a building that was like a cave so good pictures were almost impossible. I had to photoshop them to death except for the outdoor ones.
So here are some shots of the Celtic Faire that just came back to Sonora after being over the river in Angles Camp for a long, long time. Patrick Karnahan (another oldtime friend of mine) got fed up with the fair board over there and brought it back here. Most of Sonora is thrilled by that. I know I am!
The other shots are random pics I took around town of trees exploding into blossom. I had so many I could barely pick but here are the ones I think are the best.
My fave photo of all is the galloping Clydesdale!
So the first ones are of Golden Bough and Lief Sorbye (of Tempest) who was with them 25 yrs ago.
This is Paul. I posted two pics of him and my daughter from last years faire and when she was 6 yrs old.
Lief getting in the groove.
Not a great photo but it's the only one where you can see all of them.
People dress the part to the hilt (literally)
Clothes for sale so you too, can look wenchish.(¿)
Other wares for sale.
Dragons of course!
She made chainmaile everything and she told me this was the best bra she had ever owned. I told her I would take her word for it. And no, I didn't ask her to pose, she was just into it!
JOUSTING!! This is the real deal- no fake stuff- so they have to be very careful.
Joustmaster (¿) not sure that is a word really!
Fighting with real swords too..
Springtime in Sonora!
My lilac is starting to sprout
Check out the house behind this tree. It's one of the many Victorians from the early to late 1800s.
My peach tree in front.
Periwinkle blooming.
Golden bush-maybe an acacia.
Looks like snow!
Rose of Sharon. These are all over Sonora. When the Redbuds bloom I will get some of those too.
These bloom in January in my yard but this year they waited until February.
Riot of colors
Well I hope I don't make any of you allergy sufferers start sneezing..While it is quite beautiful out there today it was snowing most of the day all over the place as it is really cold here!
On that note, I am off to sit by the fire and watch an Italian movie with English subtitles.
Well I have a new water heater and it was installed by a licensed contractor. The store where I bought it a year ago had pilfered the conversion kit off the box and so I think they felt responsible for the fact that it was never converted.
They told me they wanted to swap it out even exchange. I was rather floored by that. I have shopped at this hardware store since they had opened way back in the early 80s and even with OSH moving in I refused to shop there.
I am one of those die-hard loyals and this is the reason why.
This is what I call excellent customer service and this is why I recommend places like this store. I told the general manager that I had been a loyal customer for over 30 years and that he renewed my faith in why I was one.
So the guy that put it in was also referred to me by Andy's (true value hardware) and also by my dear friend Sue. I called him coming home from having lunch with Sue and told his machine my dilemma. He responded by phone and told me that he didn't normally work Saturdays but that he considered this an emergency and so he would be here in the am.
I woke up with high hopes of having hot water by evening (and I had it by noon) and then my daughters cat Zinny came limping out of the bedroom and was hardly able to stand on either back leg.
I called my ex-work and told them I needed to get her in right away and they said I had to be there before nine since the Doc was leaving at 10 am. I was washing my hair in the sink so I had to hustle my act and get here down there. She had been in quite a fight and was in a painful way with punctures in her legs and on her back. She had been outside for a few brief hours the day before and for the first time in weeks!
I crammed her with antibiotics before I left so Doc just said to keep her on them. I rushed her home to find that the water heater was already installed and they were just finishing up stuff.(And to top it off, my car wouldn't start!! I figured it was because I was almost out of gas to boot. I got some gas and it was fine until I started it tonight. It acted as if the fuel pump was clogged.
I revved it. VARRRRRROOOOOOOOMMMMMMM.. suddenly it was running smoothly and the idle settled down too. One less thing I needed!!)
This guy was not only fast but he was only going to charge me $150 for doing it. Everyone else wanted $500 to start!!
I almost cried again. I told him I would send him another $100 when I got my check from a client and he said no rush. Wow. I thought people like him were no longer around. My faith in mankind has been partially restored.
So I have hot water- psycho bitch will get her things tomorrow and be out of our lives for good I hope and my son will start looking for more work.
I am so exhausted that I couldn't do my math homework at all.
Another day gone- but so much is so much better.
Tomorrow I meet with a new client and everything will just get better and better!!
It's amazing how dark it all looks at the start of the tunnel.. now I know why they talk about the light at the other end.
Whew!!!
Maybe forgetting everything and drinking a glass of wine while I watch Quantum Leap on DVD. Or better yet, MacGyver. Sigh. I am just trying not to cry.
I came home yesterday and when I washed my face for bed hours later I realized I didn't have any hot water. So the dog and I went outside with a flash light and matches to light the thing. Now this WH is only a year old. Nice big one too.
I open the closet door and find.... black spider webs all over. One foot long BLACK soot and scorch marks all over the outside of the heater.
I am stunned. WT? I ask myself or the dog.
I get ready to light the thing and I take the metal doors off etc. I have lit many a water heater in my time so I wasn't worried about it, but I couldn't figure out why the soot and scorch marks were there.
So I light the pilot light-whoa-it's way too big! I hold it down for the requisite one minute, stand up and turn the knob...and WOOSHHHHHHH!!
A flame shoots out of where the metal doors go about 9 inches long!
YIKES!!
I look and the flame inside is just huge and crazy.
That's when I realize that for the last YEAR- this water heater has come so close to burning down my house that I start shaking.
I shut the thing off and went into the house still very shook up.
I called the gas company this morning and told them I needed Clint to come look at this since I don't recall this happening until they had reconnected my gas a few weeks ago.
He gets here and says this has been going on for a long time. The reason? Because who ever installed it for me NEVER CHANGED IT OVER TO PROPANE GAS!!!!
All this time it's been burning up my fuel and almost killing me by fumes and by scorching my house. The ONLY reason the house hasn't burned down is because the flame was contained mostly by the metal doors and was pointed at a metal door.
So Clint caps off my gas line and red tags my water heater!! I have no hot water now. The worst part of this is that the person who installed it was a friend of my daughters that was a plumber and has the experience but not enough and I am PISSED about that. PLUS the water heater was supposed to be sold with a conversion kit and wasn't so I called that store and they will get me one free of charge.
I am still so upset that my right hand is numb because my shoulders are so tight from all of this.
That and now my son's ex gf is moving back and wants ALL of her stuff that she gave to Josh (I took a couple of things too) because she told us to take them and she moved to Washington State. She calls me at 7 am and 12 midnight even when I have told her repeatedly NOT to call here or at those hours. She is one more psycho to add to his list.
Only this time I am taking no prisoners.
If HE doesn't fix this, he is OUT on his ass.
No more nice Mom. I am done done done.
Well unlike Lisabobisa that felt better after venting I don't.
I still want to cry.....
Obviously the Zenn, with all its good intentions, was a flop due to its very limited range.
Well here is the most realistically futuristic car I have ever seen.
It is the future I will surmise...What do you think?
You guys probably know that I am not a political person, but when I watched this just now on Eclectablog's blog, well, I was blown away. All I could think of was how proud my Mom would have been. She hated Bush with a passion and was a pretty outspoken Democrat.
So I am going to re-post this so the word gets out.
Be my Valentine, for I
Each day have thought of you.
My whole life couldn't manage what
Your ready smile can do,
Vanquishing my loneliness
As though all light were new.
Let me be your Valentine
Even as you're mine,
Needing what I have to give
That each might each define
In friendship and in harmony,
Now you, now I the melody,
Each helping each to shine.
I got that from the man that gave me my Cherokee name when he adopted me into his tribe in 1971.
I was alone on VD, which is no surprise. I don't really care about the day but the commercialism of it really is a painful reminder of the fact I am alone.
I like being alone-most of the time. But I am still lonely.
Everywhere I look people are splitting up- and I want someone.
Paradoxical and depressing.
I didn't spend last night upset or obsessing over it- I actually didn't think much about it at all.
But I got that e-card from a friend I went to high school with 37 years ago and it just made me remember I am still alone.
I just finished watching Candy- a movie Heath Ledger made about two years ago. It was a bittersweet movie and I caught myself from time to time suddenly remembering that he is no longer with us and I would feel so empty-like the void he has left the world. When you see someone so alive on the screen and you realize he has died not to long ago it is a weird feeling. At least for me it is.
He was a powerful actor even in this movie for one so young. Such a terrible thing to lose someone so talented so young. I know it's old news but not to his family, not to those that loved him.
Hmmm well I guess I need to head to bed. I am beat from a not too friendly week. I came home Wednesday night to find my propane had been disconnected. So now that is costing me a bloody fortune to get that taken care of. Of course that wouldn't have happened if I had the money to pay the bill but I haven't. I have never had a utility cut off before so this was very upsetting to me.
I just don't know what else I can do; SSD only goes so far and money is very tight.
Well I won't bore you with my woes any longer, I am going to bed.
The Mona Lisa is probably the best known painting in the world. Could you paint it? I’ll give you 2½ hours. And no paintbrushes allowed. Your computer mouse should do just fine. Not up to it? Well, this guy is. He uses only Microsoft Paint.
I have tried to make a post in here about 6 times and have not had the time to just do it. I still don't since I have to make a 'quiz template' in Flash which is one program I really loathe to work with.
But I am going to take the time anyway-Well here I am typing this and making it happen!!
This is mostly just some images I took in Arcata and at Humboldt State Uni again from my recent three day trip up there to go to Jemma's orientation days. It was a grueling bus ride but I got to read a lot, crochet some and try to rest-that didn't happen.
The weather was pretty nice- no rain there or on the way. But it was freezing cold in Arcata and it's so damp that my asthma had a fit! I was using my inhaler, which I rarely ever use at home, a lot! It was so cold that when we got out to her little Volvo there was a coating of ice on the windows about a 1/4 thick. Jemma was finding this incredible and saying "what the hell?" I told her," Aren't you glad you were raised in Sonora and know how to scrape ice off a window?" She didn't appreciate that comment very much.
The first day went from 8 am to 8:30 pm with my daughter running from mandatory peer groups one after another. I went to two parental unit meetings and one peer groupy thing with her that they let me attend.
It was on diversity and tolerance.
So here are some photos of the beautiful campus again, and Arcata where we walked around a bit and had lunch.
Here is the square and a very weird sculpture in Arcata. The sculpture looks like the end of a snail or planariam worm or something to me:
The only trees left in the square:
Extremely cool house in Arcata- Adams Family goes 70s.
Jemma's little Volvo lives in Arcata now!
Some cool looking windows in town:
Back at the college:
Giant redwood tree next to Siemans Hall.
The library from the front
painting inside the library lobby.
The scull team is already practicing on the quad.
I had to be sneaky to get this image-she was NOT in a good mood by this time....At the HSU bookstore...$$$$$$$$
Looking out over the quad toward Sieman's Hall on the dead on.
Better close up of the cement tree wall at the front of the quad.
Gorgeous slate floor in the health clinic
On the way home:
Vineyards galore!
Some pointy mountain:
Shows how much I travel my own state derrrr...
Well that was my trip-one of many more to come. I didn't mind the train/bus connection. Just a lot of sitting which is hard on my back. I had been having some pain in my right hip socket for about two months and the trip really exacerbated it. I finally limped into Prompt care and they xrayed it and said I had bursitis. OUCH. No wonder it hurts so bad. So heat and Nsaids is the name of the game. It woke me up again this morning so it's not a whole lot better. I am sitting on a heating pad for goodness sakes-what more can I do?
I won't apologize for the downer post I made last time and I really do appreciate all the wonderful pep talks I got, but I am just going to have to deal with being lonely I guess. I am so busy most of the time I don't even think about it but there is every night when I go to bed-that's when it really hits me.
On another note, very saddened by the untimely death of Heath Ledger-whom we watched from his very first movie "10 things I hate about you" to his last one- I joined Netflix on a trail basis and watched BrokeBack Mountain Friday night.
Now I have to admit that I wasn't comfortable with the sex scenes but I just made myself some tea at that point and tried to keep an open mind about the story. I found myself very emotional about the love story in this movie-how terribly hard it would have been in the 70s for any kind of same sex love affair. The love these two actors portrayed for both being straight was unreal-it was tangible. I thought how tough, how brave you would have to be- and how strong was a love that transcended the norms and the barriers?
So it was a powerful movie and I am glad I did watch it. I feel very sad about such a talented young father dying so young- only 28 years old.
RIP Heath.
Today would have been my Mom's 78th birthday. I thought about her all day long. I felt.. I don't know what I felt. I never left the house- I never even took off my jammies all day.
I did some flash homework and got more upset and then I got depressed.
I cannot get flash at all. I dread using it and I am in this university class 'Using flash for e-learning." I figured (wrongly) that this wouldn't be so bad. Well it is. I tried to make a quiz today-used a template-sorta. There was not corresponding box in my program like the book said I should have to edit it with. I get upset and very frustrated by that.
Then I wonder why the heck am I bothering with all this schooling to get a bachelor's at my age? Why, so I can watch my classes not make enrollment and then I have no work, just a hefty student loan to pay off? I am on the verge of just quitting, of giving up.
I went to the movies yesterday for the first time in over 9 months.
I can't afford to go so I don't plus I don't like to go alone. And alone is what I am most of the time. I went with my g/f and saw P.S. I Love you with Hillary Swank and some gorgeous Irish dude.
Now I want an Irish dude. A real one that looks like the guy at the end of the movie, not the one that died. I cried then I cried some more. I walked out of there knowing I was really tired of being lonely. Not alone, mind you- I like being alone a lot of the time. But I am very lonely.
I am tired of being lonely and let me tell you- when you hit 50 and over- not one man looks your way again. I don't think I am that much of a schlemp at my age. I dress well and look nice when I go out and I am not horribly overweight. Ya I need to lose a few pounds but age has a way of doing that.
Still, no matter where I go- all I see are couples or older men-really older men.
I have tried the online dating thing and had one disaster after another (like Jonathan) so I have given that up pretty much too. It's like there isn't a single, single man in the county! I really don't get it. I did see a nice man having dinner alone with his 10ish daughter last night but I was with a male friend who was buying me a belated BD dinner- so of course this man won't look my way. Sigh. How do you approach something like that? Chances are I won't see him again. This county isn't as small as it once was.
On the other hand-If I am meant to see him I know I will. And I will be alone when I do. Will he say anything to me? Who knows.
I just get so down about it. I hate to say that it's a thing about getting older because I don't feel older at all, but the reality is that I am and no one wants an older woman. Men my age want the youngsters.
I/we can't compete. How can I compete with a 22 yr old that a very handsome and eligible professor is living with? By the way, he is 64. Is she beautiful? Well, lets just say on the inside, probably yes. On the outside the poor girl has no muscles let alone breasts. But whatever.
The point is, when men are going after little girls, us real, curvy, and experienced woman are left to rust on the shelf. So that is what it feels like.
I sit on the shelf and love slips through my hands like the sand.
Time goes right after it and next thing you know you are 75.
So with all of this love I have inside of me and now not even my daughter to foist it upon, I need to find an outlet for it somehow. I want to paint again but the damn PC takes up my time with school and web sites (paying ones) even this blog.
So maybe I need to stop blogging and find the answers out here.
I don't know. I just know that I am really tired of going to bed alone every, single night.
Tired of being lonely.
Happy Anniversary Mom-where ever you are hanging out tonight.
I got this video from a Canadian friend of mine via facebook.
I am quite fascinated with this car and would buy one if I had the money to do so.
This video is pretty funny in a tongue and cheek sort of way.
Tell me what you think of a car like this for $12,000. The closest one to it I have seen is the Tesla which is a gorgeous car but costs over $100K.. This is actually an affordable, if not pretty looking, alternative.
And they are made in Canada but illegal to sell and drive there. Something is wrong with this picture....
Last NHL player to play without a helmet:
Craig MacTavish, St. Louis 1996-1997
First NHL player to play with a helmet:
George Owen, Boston 1929
wore his leather football helmet
First NHL team to all play with helmets:
Boston Bruins, 4 January 1934
After seeing their defenseman, Eddie Shore fracture Ace Bailey's skull in a simple bodycheck gone wrong. They wore their leather helmets for the first time in a game where they were defeated by the Ottawa Senatore 9-2.
First goalie to wear a mask:
Clint Benedict, Montreal Maroons, January 1930
wore a leather mask for several games after a broken cheekbone but stopped wearing one due to obstructed vision on low shots.
First NHL goalie to play with a helmet regularly:
Jacques Plante, Montreal, 1959-1960
Made his own fibreglass mask
Last NHL goalie to play without a helmet:
Andy Brown, Pittsburgh, 7 April 1974
First NHL goalie to decorate his mask:
Gerry Cheevers, Boston, 1967-1968
Cheevers painted his mask with black stitch marks as a joke after Fred Stanfield scratched his mask in practice.
****************************************************'
I just watched a game with Craig MacTavish playing without a helmet. It was the last season he played with the Blues and he looked pretty funny out there without a helmet in a sea of helmeted hockey players.
